HS #60 2020.7.9
Rights versus Responsibilities
Before the coronavirus ever met our shores, I suspected that the U.S. would be hit especially hard by this modern plague. Back to that later.
As a college professor, I have long noticed a moral transformation that can happen when a young person leaves home for college. I explain it using two concentric circles – a smaller one inside a larger one.
Having lived with parents who made the rules and set the boundaries, eighteen-year-olds are practiced at living within the larger circle of “what they are allowed to do.” Moral thought is focused on staying within the circle, perhaps getting as close to the boundary as possible without crossing it. How late can they stay out? What can they consume? What are the (perhaps unspoken) rules concerning physical/romantic relationships? They had little choice in the matter. Afterall, those making the rules were living under the same roof and often the source of transportation and finances.
Then they leave home for college. Yes, there are still college rules needed for living in community, and sometimes a roommate can be more demanding than parents. But largely, they have greatly increased liberty to make their own choices. Along with choosing their own bedtimes (or more likely having no regular bedtime), eating when and what they want, and hanging out with whomever they find interesting, college students also have opportunity to jettison – or at least loosen – former moral prescriptions. So the outer circle increases in size as they enjoy exercising their newly gained liberty.
But, ideally, even as the outer circle enlarges and perhaps fades, the inner circle will become their new focus. Call it the “college challenge.”
While the outer circle is defined by “What CAN I do?” the inner circle is defined by “What SHOULD I do?” and even “What is the best thing to do?” While one is motivated to stay in the outer circle for extrinsic reasons – to stay out of trouble, the motivation to aim for the inner circle is intrinsic: How can I become a better person? What is the right, the caring, the loving, the courageous, even the sacrificial thing to do?
A good college experience will encourage students to ask these questions and find worthy answers. The encouragement should come via classes which raise questions about living justly in a world of limited resources, caring for body and spirit, and living with compassion and empathy. The encouragement may be modeled by speakers who challenge students to look beyond themselves and see themselves as part of a larger community.
Perhaps most significantly, transformation will come from meeting and becoming friends with those who have different lifestyles and values and disparate life experiences. I remember a lunch conversation with a basketball player from Davenport University’s varsity team. He was grateful that DU required only a few “general ed” classes. I challenged him that perhaps such classes are needed to help students gain a broader view of the world. He immediately responded that a friend from the team came from one of Grand Rapid’s wealthiest families, while another came effectively from off the street. Thus, his friends and teammates were enlarging and challenging his worldview. I yielded my point – impressed.
Although focusing on the inner circle has the advantage of advancing moral maturity and ethical excellence, we in America live in a culture which encourages us to concentrate on the prominent outer circle. “RIGHTS” are boldly emblazoned in the Constitution. Thus, it’s easy for Americans to focus on what we have the liberty to do rather than what we ought to do. While other countries may emphasize living in community, shared sacrifice, and being a responsible member of society, the prominent focus for many of us is “What are my rights? What CAN I do?” We are encouraged, for example, to claim the right to “keep your money in your own pocket,” while those from other countries cheerfully pay higher taxes – understanding it’s for the common good.
This mentality also explains why presently many proudly proclaim their right not to wear masks and eschew recommendations for social distancing. Recently, concerning large political rallies, the Vice President of the United States, the person given the responsibility for forming a national COVID-19 strategy, boldly stated, “We have the right to freedom of speech, and the right to peaceably assemble.”
Indeed we do. But those rights are hurting us just now. Although we may have no leader to encourage us, let’s take the “college challenge” and focus on the inner circle.